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Old 01-16-2003, 09:07 PM   #1   Add To Ignore List  
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Default The most functional word in the English language.



Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.

Consider this:
You can be shit faced,
Shit out of luck,
Or have shit for brains.

With a little effort, you can get your shit together,
Find a place for your shit,
Or decide to shit or get off the pot.

You can smoke shit,
Buy shit,
sell shit,
Lose shit,
find shit,
Forget shit,
And tell others to eat shit and die.

Some people know their shit,
While others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.

There are lucky shits,
Dumb shits,
Crazy shits,
And sweet shits.

There is bull shit,
Horse shit,
And chicken shit.

You can throw shit,
Sling shit,
Catch shit,
Shoot the shit,
Or duck when shit hits the fan.

You can give a shit,
Or serve shit on a shingle
You can find yourself in deep shit,
Or be happier than a pig in shit.

Some days are colder than shit
Some days are hotter than shit,
Some music sounds like shit,
Things can look like shit,
And there are times when you feel like shit.

You can have too much shit,
Not enough shit,
The right shit,
The wrong shit,
Or a lot of weird shit.

You can carry shit
Have a mountain of shit,
Or find yourself up shit's creek without a paddle.

Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit,
and other times you fall in a bucket of shit
and come out smelling like rose.

When you stop to consider all the facts,
It's the basic building block of creation.
And remember, once you know your shit,
You don't need to know shit else!

You could pass this along, if you give a shit.
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Old 01-16-2003, 09:16 PM   #2   Add To Ignore List  
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shit on this oscar
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Old 01-16-2003, 09:46 PM   #3   Add To Ignore List  
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I have an amusing notepad that I 'borrowed' from a friend. It has a bunch of words at the top with a checkbox by them and then below the words it has "SHIT" in big letters, followed by blank lines. Some of them I remember are:

Ah shit
Dog shit
Chicken shit
You shit
We shit
They shit
etc..
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Old 01-16-2003, 09:49 PM   #4   Add To Ignore List  
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that shit is wack
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Old 01-16-2003, 10:12 PM   #5   Add To Ignore List  
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Heh heh, I seen that before, got it on my computer somewhere.

Some funny shit <pun intended>
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Old 01-17-2003, 02:04 AM   #6   Add To Ignore List  
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No it isnt actualy funtional since most things people use it for make no sense at all.

The word has no actual meening in most cases, for example:
" Some days are colder than shit
Some days are hotter than shit, "

Those uses pretend to be comparative but they arnt, its just a noise added to a sentance.
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Last edited by Joben; 01-17-2003 at 02:08 AM.
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Old 01-17-2003, 02:55 AM   #7   Add To Ignore List  
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you only wish you could talk shit like the rest of us
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Old 01-17-2003, 06:18 AM   #8   Add To Ignore List  
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Quote:
Originally posted by Joben
No it isnt actualy funtional since most things people use it for make no sense at all.

The word has no actual meening in most cases, for example:
" Some days are colder than shit
Some days are hotter than shit, "

Those uses pretend to be comparative but they arnt, its just a noise added to a sentance.

im curious as to what you would compare those statements collectively to?

mebe somewhere in our distant past we sniffed butts...and howled at the moon...and the saying is a hold over ok mebe not.....but im curious as to the statments....i think both statements for example show an equal measure of discomfort dispite the difference of hot and cold and therefore convey the proper meaning....to see one say it is different than reading it yes but its meaning is clear to me.
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Old 01-17-2003, 08:57 AM   #9   Add To Ignore List  
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Oh shit!
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Old 01-17-2003, 09:36 AM   #10   Add To Ignore List  
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english needs new swear words

shit, **** and **** just don't do it anymore, i don't even think twice before saying them. the days of piss, bloody and damn are long gone, shit **** and **** are heading that way now.

I love to say ****...

I ain't got a ****ing problem
I just love to say ****
And I don't care who's around me
I couldn't really give a ****

And I don't care if you're my mother
Or my mother****ing father
I couldn't really give a **** now
That ain't my mother****ing problem
Oh yeah

I love to say **** when I'm driving in my car
**** when I'm walking in the ****ing park
**** you if you don't like what I say
I love to say **** every ****ing day, oh yeah

I love to say ****

Well, I hope I don't offend you
When I say the word ****
I guess you had it coming to you
You're such a worthless little ****
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Old 01-17-2003, 11:23 AM   #11   Add To Ignore List  
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that's the shit.
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Old 01-17-2003, 05:28 PM   #12   Add To Ignore List  
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Quote:
Originally posted by ZEN
im curious as to what you would compare those statements collectively to?

mebe somewhere in our distant past we sniffed butts...and howled at the moon...and the saying is a hold over ok mebe not.....but im curious as to the statments....i think both statements for example show an equal measure of discomfort dispite the difference of hot and cold and therefore convey the proper meaning....to see one say it is different than reading it yes but its meaning is clear to me.
It isnt realy just used for comparison to a certain level of unpleasantness. My point is that by using it to refer to good and bad, hot and cold etc etc the word has been deprived of any real meening,
If many uses of a word derive all their meening from the context it isnt very useful is it?

Plus in almost all cases it could be replaced with something like "stuff": Thats some sick stuff, thats some cool stuff. Using a swear just (irony intended) for the hell of it is IMHO incredibly...cant think of a realy good phrase, 'Low brow' will have to do. Cursing should be reserved for importance circumstances

[edit] actualy for many of the uses it doesnt even get up to the level of 'stuff' it can actualy be completely left out without changing the meening of the sentance at all.
"That was sick" "That was good" [edit]
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Last edited by Joben; 01-17-2003 at 05:50 PM.
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Old 01-17-2003, 05:35 PM   #13   Add To Ignore List  
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Quote:
Originally posted by Hollywood

Or my mother****ing father
that's almost a complement. hahaha
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Old 01-17-2003, 05:36 PM   #14   Add To Ignore List  
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OH MY GOD! That was Oscar! I thought he left!!!!
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Old 01-17-2003, 05:51 PM   #15   Add To Ignore List  
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Guys i've got something VERY VERY VERY nice for this thread!!!!!

**** IS ABSO****INGLUTLY THE BEST WORD

HEAR THIS
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Old 01-17-2003, 05:57 PM   #16   Add To Ignore List  
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Hehe i now move on to F***.

Many of it's uses are totaly nonsensical, they tend to be certain phrases which are coherant when used with a word like Damn which have simply had the reasonable explitive replaced with the more socialy unaceptable word.

'Were is the damn remote control?" is coherant if abreviated, you are basicaly cursing the object which annoys you ("may it be damned" literaly...well actualy i suppose damnation meens judgement more then curse...religious context i assume, but i digress) "Were is the F***ing remote control?" however is an idiotic cut and paste vulgarity. Try to imagine actualy saying with a straight face "Were is the remote control that is having sexual intercourse?"

The very fact that people do say things equivilent without any intention of humor to that shows that the words have no actual meening to them, they are noise.
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Old 01-17-2003, 06:08 PM   #17   Add To Ignore List  
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Default Re: The most functional word in the English language.

GEORGE CARLIN

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Quote:
Originally posted by Oscar


Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.

Consider this:
You can be shit faced,
Shit out of luck,
Or have shit for brains.

With a little effort, you can get your shit together,
Find a place for your shit,
Or decide to shit or get off the pot.

You can smoke shit,
Buy shit,
sell shit,
Lose shit,
find shit,
Forget shit,
And tell others to eat shit and die.

Some people know their shit,
While others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.

There are lucky shits,
Dumb shits,
Crazy shits,
And sweet shits.

There is bull shit,
Horse shit,
And chicken shit.

You can throw shit,
Sling shit,
Catch shit,
Shoot the shit,
Or duck when shit hits the fan.

You can give a shit,
Or serve shit on a shingle
You can find yourself in deep shit,
Or be happier than a pig in shit.

Some days are colder than shit
Some days are hotter than shit,
Some music sounds like shit,
Things can look like shit,
And there are times when you feel like shit.

You can have too much shit,
Not enough shit,
The right shit,
The wrong shit,
Or a lot of weird shit.

You can carry shit
Have a mountain of shit,
Or find yourself up shit's creek without a paddle.

Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit,
and other times you fall in a bucket of shit
and come out smelling like rose.

When you stop to consider all the facts,
It's the basic building block of creation.
And remember, once you know your shit,
You don't need to know shit else!

You could pass this along, if you give a shit.
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2003, 06:25 PM   #18   Add To Ignore List  
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I don't use shit much, I'm more a **** kinda person
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